Knight duty

“‘Tis the Lady of Shallot,” she said.

“Wouldst thou call upon me?”

“No chance,” I said, “new NHS policy, not efficient use of time, etc etc.”

She was a quick learner. “I sense an ill humour, and central crushing chest pain radiating to my left arm and all.”

“Oh, all right,” I snarled graciously.

I parked outside the tower in a temper, accidentally mowing down a unicorn; rather nouveau riche design, I thought. I walked up a …